Independent record stores are an endangered species and they're about to head the way of the dodo if we're not careful. If you go into your local record store today on Record Store Day you might find an album by the band dodos, but I'll bet the atmosphere in the store will be far from the doom and gloom of imminent extinction.
That is because record stores are lively hubs where the staff and customers argue about music in person (not in cyberspace). A record store is a haven for those who like musical debate and great tunes.
I guess the sad truth is that people buy less music these days, album sales are at a tweleve year low and just check out this documentry about the last record store in Tees side Uk.
Forget the depressing facts and figures because today, April 21st 2012, we celebrate Record Store Day.
If you love music, working in a record store is a dream job. I did it for two years and had the time of my life. I worked in a small independent store called Essential Music (it has since shut down- gulp!) In the record store you are surrounded by music. You eat sleep and breathe the stuff all day long. Working in a record store almost gives you license to be a music snob and loveable jerk (which is great fun). You’re the one behind the counter with the musical knowledge, which equals power in the record store!
If you work in a record store for long enough there are five things that will eventually happen to you.
Here are the top five things that happen to you if you work in a record store:
5. A customer will sing at you.
Here’s how this one will go down. It will be a busy morning the store will be full, music will be blasting from the stereo. A customer will approach the counter ask you to turn it down and say “I’m looking for a song I heard. I think it was about love. I can’t remember its name, who its by or any of the lyrics…but it goes like this” They will then without a stitch of embarrassment sing the melody of the song loudly in your face, half humming, half whining, making up the words they half remember.
Here’s how to handle the situation. Do nothing. Chances are they will keep singing until you stop them so just let them go. They may even start using their cell phone or fist as a microphone.
When they finally finish, if you have no idea what the song is tell them.
WARNING. They may say “really?” and try singing it to you a second time. If you know please put them out of their misery.
4. You may end up acting out a scene from the movie/book High Fidelity
Over my time in the store I definitely turned into one of those “know it all” music snobs who wears a toque indoors even on hot days and only wears obscure band t-shirts. Here's how to look like one too.
I became like a character in High Fidelity and so I decided to put a scene from the movie to the test. John Cussack’s character in the movie declares he can sell 5 copies of the Beta Band’s “3 E.Ps” on the strength of the first song to his easily influenced customers.
This trick really does work. In real life I tried exactly the same trick, same song “Dry the Rain” by the Beta Band and I managed to sell five copies of their album. The power of suggestion folks!
The Beta Band - Dry the Rain from the 3 E.P's
3. You will become poor but will have a record collection to brag about to anyone who will listen.
At the end of the week your boss in the record store will give you your wages. You will promptly give almost half of them back to pay for all the records you brought. If you work in a record store you get a pretty sweet discount (I continued on in the shop one day a week just to keep my discount) but your appetite for music will increase. You’ll buy the Legacy edition of albums you already have. You’ll order Japanese imports with different album covers and extra tracks and rare folk albums with strange titles you will only listen to once.
The Drowned Lovers - Nic Jones from Penguin Eggs (one of the folk albums I brought at the store and only listened to once)
You will go home with armfuls of records to tuck into, realize you are hungry and find that you have no money and only a can of old tuna in your cupboard to eat.
Regardless, you will eat said tuna straight from the can while staring in awe at your amazing record collection. Who needs sustenance when you have music?
2. At some point you will have to out fan the fan
In every record store there are a handful of super fans. They know everything about a favourite artists and will try to bore you at great length with their knowledge.
Whether they’re a fan of Uriah Heap, the Eagles, or Iron Maiden the only way to stop their incessant fan ramblings is to out fan the fan.
If your shop bore loves Neil Young and won’t stop talking about how On The Beach is the most underrated Neil Young album ever, it is time to out fan the fan. Go one step further tell them you think Trans is your favourite Neil Young album. Trans was pretty much universally panned. It is Neil’s foray into electronic music complete with vocoders, synthesizers and robots. Argue passionately that “Transformer Man” is more of a Canadian classic then “Heart of Gold”. Watch the super fans confused face, not even the super fan loves that Neil Young album. You will have successfully just out fanned the fan. Well done.
Neil Young - Transformer Man from the album Trans (I do actually love this)
1.You will discover the type of the music you will never grow tired of.
In the beginning of your career at the record store you fight every day for stereo time with your co workers. Your voracious consumption of music is immense. You will listen to everything in the store from jazz to punk, Turkish funk to 60’s freakbeat.
Then one day during a lull in the store a co worker will say to you “what do you want to listen to?” For a second you won’t know. You will be lost in a sea of silence. Then out of the darkness will come the one type of music that truly speaks to you, the music that you could listen to all day, every day!
“Put on some of that heavy dub music” was my answer.
Studio One Dub - Bionic Dub
To this day Dub music is what I reach for when I want instant tunes! What’s your go to music?
Let me know on the blog today and as always leave your comment on the blog and follow along with the show on TUMBLR where you'll find a feast of fun stuff for your ears and eyes. Also check out CBC Listener Garfield Uk's awesome map of CBC R3 Listeners locations around the globe.
Ok what are you doing? Get out there and buy some music or just go hug the beardy guy or nerdy girl in your local record store. They love music just as much as you do and they’ll tell you about their new favourite band if you give them half a chance.
Related Links:
Record store day across Canada
Gems from Rich Terfry's record collection
Record Store Day 2012: Grant Lawrence's Top 10 Record Stores in Canada
Record Store Day: Hip-hop and rap treats and exclusives
Stereogum's list of hot Record Store Day releases
Record Store Day: Feel the music (literally)
Musicians favourtie record stores